It’s the first day in May, and I’m sitting at my kitchen table facing a blank screen, unsure how to begin this post. I’ve got headphones strapped to my ears with soft jazz instrumentals filtering out of them, and in front of me is an empty cup that, not too long ago, held a generous amount of coffee. I’m not a coffee person by any means, nor am I a big fan of jazz music. These elements were supposed to serve as triggers for the somewhat evasive inspiration I seek. Safe to say they haven’t quite delivered so far.

The slightly harsh sunrays filtering in from the window beside me don’t seem to be helping matters, either. But to its credit, I’m prompted to look up and out the window at the beautiful cityscape it offers. In my line of sight is a lake, lush green trees, and a vast array of buildings stretching all the way to the far horizon. Positioned on the twelfth floor of my building, the view from this vantage point is one of my favourite things about my apartment.

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It’s been about 300 days since my last blog post in July 2023, and it’s the longest I’ve gone without writing on here. Well, I didn’t entirely quit the art. In my time away from blogging, I embarked on a 30-day self-imposed “writing challenge” last September in an attempt to grease my pen, wrote a few poems, and did some miscellaneous scribbling here and there –nothing really significant.

A lot has changed in the past few months, both positively and negatively. However, some things remain unchanged, such as my love for writing. The longer I went without writing, the more I itched to write, and the more I itched to write, the more resistance I felt to actually write, eventually leading to even more putting off. A vicious circle indeed.

I recently read a book titled “Storyworthy” by Matthew Dicks. Matthew is an accomplished “storyteller” with multiple honours in storytelling competitions (I didn’t know that was a thing), and the book primarily emphasized the power of storytelling and the art of telling a good story. (More on the book in a later post) 

We all have stories…

In the book’s preface, Matt stated; “We all have stories…”. If you’ve been around since the inception of this space three and a half years ago, you’d know that I took to blogging as a means of documenting my thoughts and sharing my experiences, mainly derived from my own “everyday stories”. I had quite a smooth run in my first year of blogging. I looked forward to penning down my thoughts and simply enjoyed the process with minimal pressure. 

However, over time, I subconsciously began judging my writings by much higher standards and gradually fell into the trap of trying to always deliver high-level content, forgetting that the simple “everyday stories” matter, too. As a result, the process became more mechanical and less enjoyable, and I went from consistently publishing a post every Sunday in 2021 to having a total of four posts in 2023. 

This blog was also to serve the purpose of indirect accountability, both as an individual navigating through life’s maze and as a writer. But that purpose cannot be achieved without actually writing. In the interest of some vulnerability, this is the “rustiest” I’ve ever felt as a writer (it still feels weird calling myself that). Theory of use and disuse in play, I guess. It does feel like I am learning to write again, and I must confess it’s a bit uncomfortable. But I am learning that being uncomfortable is sometimes a good thing. I’m learning that growth is often preceded by some form of discomfort.

So here’s to overcoming resistance, to telling more stories through writing, and to even more growth embedded in discomfort.

Have a lovely week ahead!